When you said, “I do,” and were happily married, you never expected to be faced with the possibility that your spouse cheated on you. Yet this happens all too often these days.
In case you suspect your spouse has been cheating on you, you’ll have to think strategically. If he or she is playing games with you and your mind, you need to be on the offensive rather than the defensive. If you choose to employ a divorce attorney, rather than announce it loudly, do so in private. Prepare mentally for the many “what ifs” that could come your way. Talk with someone you trust about how you should handle various situations that may come up, such as a custody battle for the children and/or what to do if the cheating spouse hides money or valuable items.
In order to prepare for divorce proceedings, consider hiring a private investigator (P.I.) to help you gather evidence of the cheating. The P.I. can take photos of the cheating couple together and gather information about where he or she goes. Then, the P.I. can testify and share his or her findings in court.
Even though feelings of betrayal can cause extreme emotions, it’s best to avoid confrontations. Detach yourself from the person as best you can, and avoid contacting them personally. If and when you do need to communicate, use email so that everything is documented.
Finally, it’s going to be a tough time for you emotionally and psychologically. Don’t be afraid to confide in a therapist or counselor. Churches and other local organizations often offer support groups where you can work through your pain. During stressful times, the love, care and support of close friends and family can also help you get through the shock of being cheated on– rather than stay in bed with the covers over your head, turn to those you trust and let them know you need their support during one of the most difficult seasons of your life.